I had my birthday this past week. Ideally, it should translate to me being wiser. It is desirable that the words older and wiser go hand in hand, sort of like a horse and chariot, or love and marriage -to quote Sinatra. In any case, my birthday was a quiet one, celebrated by my son, my mama and my siblings.
I was on the job so I took myself out to a quiet lone dinner and treated myself to a sumptuous meal. I got offered a phone number or two but I really just wanted to eat by myself and savour my supposed new wiser life. It felt surreal doing the things I used to do when I lived the single life back in Brussels. Only now I’ll be doing them all over in the Netherlands, Paris, Philadelphia, Seattle, London, Canada, California, and wherever else this life may take me.
I have so many things I still want to experience, to achieve, to become. In the past, I have moved in my own strength; I have made my own plans and prayed for God to help me execute them. This time around, I’m choosing to let my Father direct my path. He grandly promises to do this in Proverbs if we trust in Him and acknowledge Him. ‘Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct your path’ Proverbs 3:5-6.
He tells us in John 15 that He is the vine and we are the branches, that apart from Him we can do nothing. We wouldn’t breathe without Him, wouldn’t walk, wouldn’t be or become… Yes of course, I want to abide in Him; I have little desire to do anything apart from Him. And as I bring my goals and plans under submission to His word, I continue to seek His will on the ones He will have me pursue.
He promises we shall do exploits (Daniel 11:32b); how can I not wait upon Him with such a promise; could I ever imagine that my exploits would trump His? Of course I’d rather wait upon the Lord (Psalm 27:14), for in Him, we shall do valiantly (Psalm 60:12).
I have this burning desire to go deeper with my Lord, to immerse myself fully in His word, lean on Him, learn from Him, drink from His cup, nestle in His loving arms, abide in His love. Nothing could ever go wrong in His presence. Even what the devil intends for harm, He still takes it and turns it around for our good (Genesis 50:20). I am victorious all day everyday in Him. I desire an even more intimate walk with Him. But for the grace of God I live. Helena xoxo